For God's sake, start managing up!

If your boss…

• is losing trust in you
• is micromanaging you
• has a better relationship with the rest of the direct reports than with you
• has to constantly ask you about the progress

… it’s maybe time to leave. If you don't want to, it is time to start new method — managing up.

Most likely, you are paid for moving the business forward in the most effective way possible. Depending on your responsibility, the granularity of the path forward is defined by your manager or leader (I’ll use boss from now on).

I’ve seen many bosses that had to step in because nobody managed them up. They had no idea what their report's plan was, and their default question wasn’t “tell me your plan” as it is not their management style. You can blame them for not doing that and maybe you are right, but it will change nothing. They are still your manager.

Have you actually tried to explain the context and your plan to your boss? Or are you just in reaction mode?

Your boss

Just to clarify: I’m going to skip the option that your boss is a pathological control freak. In that case, you should switch jobs ASAP.

In general

• A boss’s job is to keep moving things forward and deliver results for the company/board/owners
• Drives cross-organization initiatives and spends time with customers while dealing with strategic topics
• Has to report to his boss as well
• Usually cares about the result, not the process
• Wants to spend as little time as possible on task definition
• Lacks the same level of detail that you have
• Talks in What/How/When because he already finished the Why discussion in his head

Expectations

• A boss expects his reports will automatically take ownership of the topic
• Expects you to understand the topic and if not, you’ll learn it or ask
• Wants to be sure you are moving forward as quickly as possible
• Wants to understand how he can unblock stuck items
• Expects you’ll share the progress
• Likes to be challenged with arguments and facts (based on data)

An experienced boss expects high agency. If it’s not happening, he’ll start losing trust in you, which leads to micromanagement or replacement. Micromanagement is a great indicator of a lack of trust.

CFA framework

CFA is about building trust by showing high agency — that you are on it and you have it under control. Continuously building trust will allow you to do more in the way you like. You can also gain additional resources, save time, and step up on the career ladder. You have more control than you might think. CFA is a set of proactive actions towards your boss.

Understand

• Make sure you understand what’s the goal and purpose of the initiative.

Explain

• If you have to deal with a more complex initiative with a lot of unknowns, it is expected to explain your plan without asking.
• Mention steps, tradeoffs, risk, and mitigation
• Talk in deadlines and outcomes And remember… “If you don’t have a plan, you become part of somebody else’s plan.”

Communicate

• Proactively send async updates on a regular basis (short Slack message every Monday)
• Follow up on previous steps, explain the next ones, and set the right expectations

Use data

• As arguments and input for decision making
• Back up your intuition with hard data and visualize it accordingly

Ask for help

• Use your boss’s power to make marketing cooperate
• Ask for prioritization opinions

Get it done

• It doesn’t matter what the process looks like — don’t talk about it
• What matters is getting stuff done and showing it (separate session for large initiatives, Slack message for small ones)

If you don’t know what level of detail you should share, just ask your boss.

It’s not just about building trust

1. It helps you think about your priorities and focus
2. From a long-term perspective, it might help you with your mental health as you’ll remove some underlying stress

The more you f around, the more you find out

Once you start managing up, reality might be ugly. You might find out that your boss really doesn’t have a plan. Or goals. Or that he is missing some really important details. You are going to ask yourself the question, “Shouldn’t he know that? He is the boss.” Welcome to the world of unrealistic expectations. Your boss also isn’t flawless. It is up to you how you’ll handle these situations and whether you shield it, help with it, or raise it in your therapy. Remember: we are learning by walking the journey, not by achieving the result.

A word of wisdom

Like always, I'm not the first one raising this topic. Shreyas did a really good overview of motivations and reality of Managing up.

So please… start managing up, for God’s sake! On behalf of your career, learning curve, and your boss’s mental health.